How to make better decisions: 9 tips to choose with confidence
Clinically reviewed by Dr. Chris Mosunic, PhD, RD, MBA
Do you always struggle with small decisions like which toothpaste to buy or bigger ones like where to live? Explore 9 tips to help you make decisions with more ease.
You make countless decisions every day, from whether to hit snooze to what to make for dinner. Most of these choices are pretty minor, but the big ones—where you live, who you date, and how you spend your time—can shape the course of your life. That’s why learning to make thoughtful, confident decisions is so important.
Of course, it’s not always that easy, and if you struggle with decision-making, you’re not alone. Fear of making the wrong choice is real and decision fatigue is exhausting. After all, we live in a world where almost every decision feels like it needs to be optimized — who hasn’t scrolled through six menus, read all the reviews, and still felt unsure about where to eat? With so many options and so much pressure to get it “right,” it’s no wonder we get stuck.
It doesn’t have to be this way, though. There are tools that can help you cut through the noise, trust your gut, and stop overanalyzing every possible outcome. Here’s how.
Why do I struggle to make decisions?
A lot of people struggle to make decisions, in part because our brains weren’t built to do it all day, every day. Here are some of the reasons why it can be hard to make a decision:
You’re experiencing choice overload: Ever notice how choosing something small—like what movie to watch—can take more than 20 minutes? That’s called choice overload. When we have too many things to choose from, we tend to freeze, overthink, or default to whatever requires the least mental effort (which is why you’ve seen “Mean Girls” 1,000 times).
You fear regret: One of the biggest decision-making saboteurs can be fear that you’ll regret it later. The desire to make the “right” choice can lead to nonstop second-guessing and zero actual choosing.
You don’t trust yourself: If you’ve made a choice in the past that didn’t turn out well, you might worry that you’re incapable of making good decisions. (It’s not true! You can!) Still, once that happens, even simple choices feel risky and charged.
Stress hijacks your brain: When you’re overwhelmed or burnt out, your prefrontal cortex, or the part of your brain that handles logical thinking, can go offline. As a result, your lizard brain may take the wheel and tell you to avoid everything, which can make choosing a path seem impossible.
You’re waiting to feel 100% sure: Sadly, you may never know with 100% certainty that you’re making the right choice. Most of the time, you’ll most likely feel 70% sure, and that’s fine. Waiting for certainty can leave you stuck and lead to you never making a decision.
4 types of decision-making (and why knowing yours helps)
Some people have a much easier time making choices than others. Understanding your default decision-making style can help you stop judging yourself, recognize some of your patterns, and help you start working with your brain instead of against it.
Here are four of the most common types.
1. The decisive decider
You usually know what you want. You’re the person who scans a menu once and orders confidently while everyone else is still looking. You tend to trust your gut and rarely look back.
Superpower: Speed and clarity
Potential trap: Overlooking important details or rushing into choices that might need a little more thought
2. The flexible chooser
You tend to weigh your options, but you’re adaptable. You’re okay with changing your mind if you’re presented with new information. You don’t cling to decisions — you just go with what works in the moment.
Superpower: Adaptability and openness
Potential trap: Second-guessing or changing course a little too frequently
3. The hierarchical planner
You love a good pros-and-cons list. You define your priorities, gather info, analyze it, and then make a decision that aligns with your values and goals. You tend to be strategic and intentional.
Superpower: Logical and thorough decision-making
Potential trap: Getting stuck in research mode and taking too long to act
4. The integrative processor
You take your time because you want to consider everything, including emotions, logic, vibes, advice and your intuition. You try to see the whole picture, and you want your decisions to reflect that complexity.
Superpower: Big-picture thinking and deep insight
Potential trap: Analysis paralysis, especially when choices have big emotional weight
How to make decisions: 9 tips to help you choose with confidence
If you’re finding yourself overwhelmed by making a decision, try to remind yourself that there’s no such thing as a “perfect” choice. It’s perfectly acceptable to make a good enough one. Here are a few simple strategies that can help you get unstuck and move forward with less anxiety.
1. Get grounded before you decide
Trying to make a big decision when you’re spiraling isn’t going to go well.
First, pause and try to get yourself to a less frazzled space. You could try closing your eyes for a second and taking a few deep breaths, or just focus on your feet on the ground.
💙 Listen to Grounding with Tamara Levitt when you feel out of control.
2. Check in with your values, not just your fears
Fear can be overwhelming, but you can keep it in check by staying true to your values.
Instead of just choosing the least risky option, consider which choice feels the most like you. What matters to you in the long run?
💙 Jay Shetty’s Delineate Your Values session can help you get more in touch with what’s important to you.
3. Narrow it down to three options
If you’ve got too many choices, do a quick gut check. Ask yourself what’s clearly a no, or what feels unrealistic right now, and cross those off. Then choose from the top two or three that actually make sense for you.
This can help reduce the noise in your head so that you can actually hear yourself think. (If you’re still feeling unsure, here are easy four steps you can do to meditate for decision-making.)
4. Don’t wait for the mythical “right” feeling
Before making a decision, some people wait for a lightning bolt of certainty, which usually never arrives.
Many times, clarity comes after the choice and not before. Try to make peace with the fact that you might need to make a decision without all the information — and you may learn after the fact that it wasn’t the best one. That’s okay.
5. Try the 10-10-10 rule
Ask yourself how you’ll feel about this decision 10 minutes from now, 10 months from now, and 10 years from now. This can be a very effective way to pull yourself out of panic mode.
By putting the decision into a longer timeline, you can make your choices feel smaller. On the other hand, choices can also start to feel even more important when you realize they align with your long-term values.
6. Phone a friend
Getting a second opinion from someone who knows you well can be helpful — as long as you don’t turn everything into a poll. The more people you ask, the more conflicting advice you’ll most likely get, and this can make you even more stressed.
Consider choosing one or two trusted friends who won’t judge you, but will still tell you the truth.
7. Use your body as a compass
When you’re trying to make a choice, pause and ask yourself, “How does my body respond?” Does your chest tighten? Does your stomach flip in a bad way?
You don’t need to base your entire decision on how you feel physically, but using these cues can be a sneaky way to sense what feels right to you.
8. Flip a coin
If you find yourself in a situation where you’re fine with your options, consider flipping a coin and then paying attention to your gut reaction before it lands. Did you hope for heads? Did your heart sink when it came up tails? This might help tell you something.
This method is not about letting chance decide, but rather, better understanding how you truly feel.
9. Give yourself a deadline
When decisions stretch out forever, they tend to breed more anxiety. Set a soft deadline for smaller decisions, like what to make for dinner, and a firm one for the big stuff like a job offer. There’s nothing worse than marinating in indecision.
How to make a decision FAQs
What is the best way to make a decision?
There’s no one magical way to make the best decision, but a solid approach usually combines three things: grounding yourself, staying true to your values, and reducing your feelings of overwhelm.
To get in the best state of mind, try to take a breath, narrow your options, and ask yourself, “Which makes the most true most sense for me and what I really believe?”
Also, give yourself permission to change your mind later. There's nothing wrong with that.
How do I know if I’m making the right decision?
You typically won’t know for sure if you made the right decision at first. Still, a good thing to remind yourself is that the “right” decision isn’t always the easiest one. Sometimes it’s the one mostly right — but is completely in line with your values.
If a decision brings a tiny bit of relief, curiosity, or quiet knowing (even underneath the panic), trust that. That’s your inner compass speaking.
What is a decision tree?
A decision tree is a fancy term for something your brain probably already does which is map out different choices and their possible outcomes. It’s a visual tool that starts with your main question at the top like “Should I move cities?”, branches out into possible decisions like “Stay” or “Go”, then further branches out into what each choice might lead to like costs, benefits and maybe even possible regrets.
This tool can be great for visual thinkers or anyone who feels stuck in a case of analysis paralysis as its part logic chart and part anxiety organizer.
How can I stop overthinking every choice I make?
Overthinking is usually your brain’s way of trying to protect you from making a “bad” move, but it ends up being its own kind of trap. If this happens to you regularly, try to interrupt the spiral.
Start by grounding yourself. You could breathe, walk, or shake out your body. Then after you do that, set a time limit for decision-making and ask yourself: “What would I tell a friend in this exact situation?”
You might find that you’re way kinder and more clear when the pressure’s off. After all, most decisions aren’t permanent, and you can always adjust later.
How can I make really hard decisions?
Hard decisions typically feel heavy because they touch something deep like your values, your relationships, or your sense of self. When you find yourself in this situation, usually the best way through is in small and compassionate steps.
Start by naming what’s hard about it and try to sit with that honesty and break it into parts. Ask yourself what you know for sure, what are the unknowns, and where you need more info or support.
Also, if it helps, consider writing a letter from your future self who’s already lived through the outcome. Most likely this will remind you that you’re still alive, still learning, and to trust that you can handle it, even if it’s a little messy.
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